Your value doesn’t decrease based on somebody’s ability to see your worth
-Unknown
You are probably looking at the title right now thinking, Phoebe how on earth am I a masterpiece,who is as delicious as a muffin! When I am constantly feeling anxious and down, I always get rejected by people and have been made fun of in the past. So really, I feel more like a rotten piece of garbage!
(Geez hope you breathed in that sentence because that was LOOONG!)
BUT I GET YOU GUYS AND GALS I GET YOU! But you should know that it is your limiting beliefs that are affecting your ability to see yourself for who you are (beautiful and unique)! This is why it is so important to know how to deal with these beliefs or to learn to tackle them in a way that is loving to yourself!
P.S If you are still a bit overwhelmed hold on, it will make more sense soon!
Another thing you might also be thinking is that what does this have to do with autism? (I know I’m a mind reader).
Well, one way in which limiting beliefs is affected in those on the spectrum particularly in girls, is through a thing called MASKING!
Which as we discussed in previous posts , we imitate others to fit in. This can be extremely emotionally exhausting for that means we are never truly ourselves. Possibly because we do not see our authentic selves as good enough to be able to fit into everyday society!
However you were never meant to fit in! Your beauty, flaws, and all the things that make you you! Is what has given you the ability to achieve something really special and unique to you in this life! However I don’t want to undermine any of these limiting beliefs that you have built over your life experiences!
BECAUSE MAN ARE THEY TOUGH and again is not your fault! I can tell you my limiting beliefs and feeling less then I have got in the way of my own life, as I have a fear of staying away from home for too long because I suddenly feel that I have to put a front on that I can’t relax! Maybe you are reading this, thinking that you do the same thing in a different situation
DISCLAIMER: These points count for EVERYONE, not just those on the spectrum! (Probably should have mentioned that)
Let me show you an example of this in everyday life in a little drama scene (For all my dramatic Queens and Kings…AND ACTION!
Ok ok, so I’ve got this event on later but i don’t know if i should go or not because they are not my typical group of friends, and oh no now I feel really anxious and shouldn’t go! Oh but what if I get FOMO! Ahhhh
Cut….And action!
Oh no…everybody is doing something I don’t want to do! I could join in but my stomach is already churning…Ahhh I bet to do it because I don’t want anybody to make fun of me or think I’m different!
ANDDD.SCENE
Been there done that! And I get it, you think that in your situation it is better to do what everybody else is doing rather than live up to your amazing worth. Or you don’t feel like you will be yourself in a certain social setting, so you spend ages worrying about what you should do or reflecting on the situation!
But what these both have in common is that you are telling yourself , you are not good enough to live up to your worth and be yourself !
This feeling can be heartbreaking, tearful and depressing, which again shows how limiting beliefs can taste like a piece of rubbish sometimes!
BUT GUESS WHAT??
YOU CAN CHANGE THIS!
BUT HOW MIGHT YOU ASK?
By believing this…
You are who God says you are not what other people say you are!
Or if you are not a christian change God to someone who you know loves you unconditionally (but I’m telling you even if you don’t believe in God he believes you unconditionally anyway!)
In the book of Ephesians in the bible, God calls us masterpieces which is a definition of your self-worth. Whether you believe it or not…
THAT IS WHAT YOU ARE WORTHY OF! FOR YOU ARE UNIQUELY AND BEAUTIFULLY MADE FOR A SPECIAL PURPOSE IN MIND!
You might be thinking how am I worthy of being a masterpiece, when my mental health is a mess and I’ve done ‘bad’ things!
Well the word masterpiece is just that. You are pieces that have been put together to create something beautiful. So ok you may be a bit broken at the moment and your pieces are scattered everywhere. But slowly day by day, the pieces are being put together, you are healing from negative experiences and shame. And one day you are going to look back to see how far you have come!
However, what’s really interesting about this analogy, is that without the broken pieces you couldn’t have been made into a masterpiece.
Which means your worth now is seen as just as worthy back then. Amazing right! Well in other words you’re amazing!
On the other hand, if you still don’t believe that, here are some tips on how to put yourself back together!
- Pray: I know a lot of you are reading this right now thinking you may not be christians or struggle to believe that there is an invisible being who created the world and looks after you on a daily basis! And man do I get you, which is why It has spent me 4 years to now be in a state of mind that God is 100% real and Jesus died for our sins! So trust the process,and know that God only wants you to speak to him, even if it’s just you saying ‘I need help’ and you’re not even sure if God is real yet! But TRUST ME! God has transformed my life in more ways than I could ever imagine,helping me forgive those who I thought I would never forgive and giving me the strength to say sorry when I’ve hurt someone else. Whilst always blessing me with great friendships, relationships and the small everyday miracles!AND GUESS WHAT THIS LEAD TO…AN IMPROVEMENT IN MY SELF-WORTH! AND HE CAN DO THE SAME IN YOUR LIFE TOO! All you gotta do is ask
2.Nutrition: I’m sure you are either groaning right now or saying you already do this and are tempted to skip to the next point! But HOLD ON!You might be surprised and get some good value from this point!As you already know, eating well can bring a lot of physical appearance such as energy levels, mood and physical appearance! But have you ever thought about the mental benefits of nutrition? For example, eating a colourful diet can result in improved hormonal balance, which in return will improve your mental health and cause less sudden moments of sadness if hormones are imbalanced! Furthermore, eating healthy always makes me feel like I am being my true self, without underlying tiredness, emotional roller coasters that can come from comfort eating or fad diets which has led me to be a more emotionally in control person! AND NO, healthy eating is not green salads with low calorie dressing (unless you like that, then a big round of applause for you!). It’s yummy smoothie bowls and sugar free desserts that honestly taste better than chocolate sometimes!All with a recipe you can find a quick search on google! And man does eating yummy foods that are good for you make you feel so freaking good! And your confidence and self-worth will skyrocket!
Of course, quick disclaimer! Your confidence will only skyrocket if you are eating healthy for the right reasons, so please please don’t let your motivation for eating healthy be instagram modals and calorie counting. For it means you are claiming your self-worth is built after you have achieved your ‘dream body’, Which isn’t the case at all because you will be a master price before and after you lose weight! So try and show that to how you see and in return treat your body!
3.exercise: To follow on from the last point, usually nutrition and exercise go hand in hand ( I know you are probably groaning again). But like nutrition, exercise doesn’t have to be a long run,or gym work. It could be a good old dance around your room, or a quick power walk in nature! And yes I do these on a daily basis, and yes you will get fitter and look more toned! But like nutrition, exercise helps you get rid of negative emotions and release endorphins. I remember once I was having a bad day,and had been feeling numb and the last thing I felt like was going for a run, but I decided todo it because I knew I would feel better after! Anyway as I was running I started crying my eyes out! And although this probably doesn’t sound like a good thing, exercise was helping me release suppressed feelings, thus making me feel better and more like the valuable QUEEN I am! Did people stare at me, yes. Was it worth it, heck YES!
So remember to do exercise and nutrition because you love yourself, not because you want to love yourself!
4.Cold water swims: Ok…this may seem bonkers, but on the days I don’t like to exercise and they days I do1 Cold water swims were the best thing I ever started doing! One, because the cold water instantly takes your thoughts away from the worry or sad thoughts you were having before! Plus they are sooo good for your bodyso whether its a cold, shower, bath or swim in the lake, sea or pool, trust me you will thank me later, just tale a deep breath and JUMP IN!
5.positive everyday habits; Exercise, nutrition, prayer and cold water swims are all everyday positive habits! But so is reading,planning your day, spending time with your hobbies and arranging a cup of tea with your dad everyday at 4pm (even if you live in the same household)! So make time to do one of these just 15 minutes in the morning and 15 minutes before bed everyday, even on the weekend! You wouldn’t believe what this has done in my life and can help one grow into the person they were meant to be! So start small, maybe read a book when you wake up and make a list of things you are grateful for before bed! Without even realising it, you will grow in self-worth and understanding!
ANDDDDD…THE END!
If you have made it this far, thank you! And I hope you gained some valuable insight into what an amazing Masterpiece you really are! And that you should aim to live up to this worthy calling Gdd hintended for you! Hope you guys didn’t mind the slightly longer posts today, accidentally deleted the first one, so hoping this one was slightly less wordy 9or atleast better worded!
Catch you all next week, and thank you so so much for reading and catch you all next week!
Lots of love,
PhoebeGrazia xx
Sincere Self-Worth Clothing 